Suffering. Life is full of suffering.
Yesterday I think I overloaded on my caffeine and I ended up only fell asleep at 4am something and woke up again at 5am and fell asleep again and woke up at 10.30am. And I felt weird, odd, hype, alert but blank mind at the same time. I wasn’t very myself to begin with.
And I was slightly excited to go to one of my class that I know i might have the chance to meet that mystery boy again. Whom I never talk to before. nor knowing what is his name. He somewhat has this grace that I can just spend my time admiring him. And I went into the class way earlier than usual, hoping he will actually comes and sits on the same row with me. And shit. Things didn’t went on like I expected. My groupmates (whom I know them nothing) ended up sat beside me (on both sides) and I was so frustrated. And that boy sat on the row behind me.
At the corner of my left eye, I can see him sitting alone again. Like usual. If I’m not blocked by those stupid groupmates I wouldn’t miss my chance.
Nonetheless, in deep down, I am scared. The charm of not knowing him is just so beautiful. Sometimes, there are things should be left not knowing. I am not pretty to begin with. or any talented or anything. And I have no idea how he sounds like. Is he a local HK? Does he has this crappy accent? I have this fetish. He cannot sounds bad. He must be able to have perfect (almost) English. Okay I’m being weirdo now.
So, should I walk right front and talk to him one day? Our common class is numbered. I shouldn’t be wasting more time.